7 Months

Dear Colin,
   You are now a 7 month old. The time has just flown by with you. I can't believe it has already been that long. You now weigh 21 lbs and 6 ounces. You are 28 inches long. In the last month you have grown an inch taller but  gained less than a pound. You are still wearing 12 month clothes and they are still a little big on you so I'm hoping you will stay in them for a while longer.
   You can sit up on your own and love to sit and play with toys and watch what is going on.  You can roll but only do it in your bed or on my bed. I have seen you do it a few times on the floor but you don't do it often. If you fuss long enough you have found someone will bring you the toy then you don't have to roll. When on your stomach you will get your legs up under you and push up on your arms but I still think you are a few months away from crawling.
  For almost a week now you have been sleeping through the night. You go to bed about 7:30 and sleep until sometime in the 4 o clock hour then you wake up eat really quick and go back to sleep until a little after 6. I LOVE it. It is so nice to get to sleep through the night.
   For food you are eating between 1.5 and 2 jars of food a day. You like almost everything now. Your favorites are banana's and sweet potatos. You are on half formula and half breastmilk. You still don't care for formula all that much but will take it. Your breast milk you suck it down faster than a fire truck going to a fire.
   You are a mommies boy. You love your mommy and don't go to many other people. You will let daddy hold you but you don't like anyone else to really hold you for long. You love your sister to pieces. Any time see pays any attention to you your face lights up and you get so excited.
   You also love to be outside. You enjoy the nice weather and playing with dirt and other things that you find laying around out there.
   We had to move you out of your baby car seat because you were just getting too big. You now have a big car seat like your sister and you enjoy sitting in it and looking out the window or watching your sister.
   In the last month you took your first airplane ride to California.  You did fantastic while out in California and the family loved getting to meet you.
   You are still trying to get over the RSV and we still do at least two breathing treatments a day. You wake up in the morning coughing a lot but for the most part during the day you are okay, just breathing a little harder and faster. We have an appointment with a doctor on Sept. 8
   I love you big boy. You light up my life. I enjoy snuggling with you and listening to you "talk". I am one lucky mommy to have such amazing children in my life.
Thank you for all your smiles and laughs.

Love,


Mommy

A Mother's Work is never Done

A mother's work is never done. It is like laundry or dishes once you put the last piece away something new gets dirty. No matter how many things I cross off my to do list 3 more pop up. What makes my list grow even more is when you add the daycare stuff on top of it.
Before when I worked outside of the home if I didn't feel like vacuuming the floor or putting dishes away I could leave it. It wouldn't be done when I got home from work but it wasn't that big of deal. Now if I don't put the dishes away then we have no place to put all the new dishes we create throughout the day. If I don't do laundry then we don't have bibs for the day.
  I have kids 7:30 am to 8pm. Then I have to make sure everything is done for the day. My down time for myself is from 8:30-9:45 then it is to bed because my kids are up at 6:00-6:15 in the morning.
   I have dreams of checking into a hotel and laying in bed watching TV without worrying about what is going on and taking a nice LONG shower and enjoying the shower instead of hurrying because I'm not sure who is going to wake up while I'm in there.
   I love being a mom and I love running my own business. But I would really really love a nice drink, a place to put my feet up and no to do list for about 12 hours!

Sleeping through the night

Since Friday Colin has been sleeping through the night. He goes to bed between 7 and 8 and gets up at 4 to eat and then sleeps until a little after 6. I will take it! This is 10 months sooner than his sister. He also takes better naps than his sister ever did, so lets hope he keeps it up!

RSV SUCKS

I miss my Colin that was only crabby when he was tired or hungry. I miss my baby that would sit and play by himself and I miss my baby that would wake up eat and go back to sleep.

  I see that baby every once in a while but for the last 3 days it has been lots of tears, lots of hour long wake ups at night and all around miserable Mommy and Baby. Tomorrow I go see the people that are doing the research on RSV. I am praying to God that they can give me some insight on how I can help Colin breath a little better and maybe just maybe I can have my baby back. 

Obstacles

When I decided to stay home and open my own daycare I knew that I wanted to make it as legal as possible.  So I took the proper steps to get my state license and all the proper steps to make my home safe. From the beginning how I needed to go about getting all the paperwork kept changing. It depended on who you talked to and what time of day it was. 
   This is still the case. Today I got my stuff from the food program telling me that I was over my numbers. I went back re-read the rule book and then called the food program to explain that no I was not over I was just fine. They inform me that is not what state has said.  So I have to call my state guy. He is known for not calling me back.  So I will call him again next week and try to get this all straightened out.
   I could have done this under the table and not by the book, and really all a license does is give me a piece of paper saying the state knows about me, but I didn't and now all the hassle is getting frustrating. It is a good thing I love my daycare kids and am happy with what I am doing otherwise I might be tempted to just throw in the towel.
In other news I just sat down and worked on my up to date budget and I am very happy the way my business is going and hope to see the numbers continue to go the way I want them to.

Cough

While in California I started not feeling good. I kept brushing it off, telling myself that I was just tired and that I was fine.

I woke up Monday morning with needles in my throat and a horrible rash all over my body. I called my assistant Jenni and asked her to bring a friend and come work for the day. I knew I had to go to the doctor and get better.

The doctor told me it was just a cold and my body was run down and gave me some steriods for my rash. I came home and took a nap and started to feel better.

Today Colin is feeling horrible. Chris took him to the doctor who also said that it was just a cold and to keep doing what we are doing.

I feel so bad for Colin because I know he can't breath and he is miserable. He hasn't eaten much today and has cried most of the day. I am so at a loss as to what I can do to make him better. We go see the research team for RSV on Friday. I am praying that they might have another option for me to try with Colin. I want so badly for him to feel better. We are now past the two month mark of when he got sick.

When Alyssa was sick it was with ear infections and so we would give medicine and at least for a few days she would feel better. With Colin there has been no relief. Every now and then we get a day here or there where he doesn't cough very much but by the next day he is coughing badly again.

I hope by the three month mark he feels better and can breath again.

Meeting People

In California Colin got to meet a lot of new people. However, I was not able to get pictures with everyone.

He did get to meet his great-grandma Shirley.

His Uncle Michael.

His Aunt Lauren

He saw again his Grandpa and Nana

He also met his Great Uncle Gary and Great Aunt Carolyn, second cousins Katie and Kelly, my great Uncle Larry and many more people that have no relation to the family but are very close with the family.

He was the hit with everyone. I got so many complements on how well he was behaved, and how cute he was. He was mostly smiles but even his tears where far and few between.

The Flights

Colin did so well flying. There was only a tiny bit of each flight were he would cry. It was never loud enough for anyone but the people right in front of or behind us to hear and it was always solved quickly. He like to be in his car seat playing with toys or in my lap looking at the people around us.

When we landed in phoenix we got off the plane and went through security check point so that Colin and I could see my mom. It was supposed to be an hour visit but my plane went from being delayed two hours to being on time so the visit was short.

I loved watching my mom play with Colin. Colin was tired but he was still willing to smile and play with my mom. He even stayed happy with her long enough for me to go to the bathroom without having to take him with me.

Once in California he slept the whole time it took to get bags and the was awake long enough to get to the car where he then fell asleep and slept until the hotel.

On the way back he was asleep at take off from California slept the whole plane ride to phoenix. He then was awake the whole lay over in phoenix got some dinner. Then from Phoenix to St. Louis he was only awake for about 30 minutes. The rest of the time he was asleep, which was nice as I got to rest some too.

Traveling By Yourself

When flying by yourself there are things you take to keep you entertained and ways you pack to make it the easiest to go through the security check points. When traveling with a baby there is another way you pack to stay entertained and make it easiest for security checkpoints.

I was flying with Colin on two different airplanes each way. So I left at 3:30 and my plane left at 6:10. Here is a play by play of the day.

4:30 got to the long term parking lot. Got all my bags out of the car. Put the carseat on the stroller. Put my front pack on and then put Colin in it. Put the diaper bag on my shoulder, pushed the stroller with one hand and pulled the suitcase with another.

4:45 still waiting for a bus so walk to another bus stop and get picked up. I hand the guy my suitcase, go back get the stroller and carseat put that on the bus then climb on myself putting my diaper bag next to me on the seat.

5:25 make it to the airport. Unload the bus, walk to check in. Have to wait in the long line to get my infant boarding pass. Pull out my ID and Colin's birth certificate. Get rid of suitcase.

5:35 Now I'm at security check point. I grab 3 bins. In the first bin I put my shoes, my boarding pass, my cell phone. In the second bin I put the diaper bag, pulling out the bottles and formula and baby meds. I then take the carseat off the stroller and fold the stroller up. I put those on the counter. I then take Colin out of the front pack, put that in the last bin and push them all to the x-ray machine. I go through. Ask a nice man to hold Colin while I put the front pack back on, and a security guard opens my stroller. I step out of the way put the carseat back on the stroller and off we go.

5:35 get me some dinner, feed Colin

6:10 Board the plane with carseat, dropping stroller at the bottom of the gate. Put Colin in carseat get out bottle and wait for take off.

It is a lot easier flying without a child but I have to say Colin did fantastic!

Flying

I leave this afternoon for California with Colin. Let me tell you going on a trip with a kid takes a lot more stuff than just going by yourself. If I was traveling by myself I would have one suitcase and I would carry it on.

With Colin I have a car seat, stroller, diaper bag, and suitcase. Now because Chris is keeping Alyssa at home for this trip I can't have him drop me off and pick me up from the airport so I have to drive myself. So I have to park in long term parking and get all that stuff on the bus, off the bus and to my gate. I am going to check the suitcase but the rest has to go all the way to the gate with us. I hope some person takes pity on me and helps because it is going to be a lot of work.

I am looking forward to Colin getting to meet the family, but sad that this is the reason we are going out there. I also still have to write what I'm going to say at my Grandpa's funeral.

Wish me luck!!

Decisions Decisions

My grandpa died today. So I am leaving Thursday night for California and returning home at 11:50 pm on Sunday. At first I had planned on taking Colin (he is 6 months now). But now that it is over the weekend Chris would be home.

I nurse him but my supply is drying up so we have been offering him formula. He doesn’t like it but will take it reluctantly. He usually only gets about 4 oz of formula a day but I only have 15 oz in the freezer so he would be on almost all formula while I was gone. Also on Friday my mother-in-law would have to watch him and the last two times she has watched him he has screamed most of the time.

I know it would be easier not to take him because of travel and time difference. But also none of that family has ever met him.

If you were me what would you do?

This is the question that has haunted me since 2:00 this afternoon. I would get all set on taking him and then change my mind. Be all set on not taking him and then change my mind again.

At this point after asking a lot of moms, both my mom and mother in law, and my dad( who was really set on him coming out) I am bringing him. Wish me luck!

Colin

Colin is still not feeling well. He is super congested and cranky because of it. I can't blame him. I mean he hasn't been able to breathe normally since April 18. That is a long time of not breathing well.

Because of his up and downs on eating my supply has dropped and I don't produce enough milk anymore. He still gets 90% of it from me but 10% has to come from formula as I'm running out of frozen milk.(That is a sore subject since I donated over 700 oz).

Colin will take the formula from Chris but he will not take it from me. He will move the nipple of the bottle around and push it out of his mouth. Today I tried to have Jenni feed it to him and he wouldn't take it from her either.

I guess if he gets hungry enough he will take it. Until then I will just keep trying and hope that someday very soon he will be able to breath like a normal boy again.

I hate that I have to pump his body full of meds that don't seem to be helping him in any way. I keep hoping this nice weather will help.

Church

A year ago March(2010) we started going to the Methodist Church right behind our house. In July(2010) we became members of that church and this past March(2011) we had Colin baptized there.

Since we started going we have sat in the same seats. Second row from the back, middle section, middle of the row. We sit next to some older ladies. These older ladies have adored Alyssa the whole time. One of them is always bringing gifts for Alyssa and gave me hand made blankets for both of the kids right before Colin was born. They always are quick to greet the kids.

There are also some people that have taken an interest in Chris and I but usually it is still just the small talk with them. If we put a prayer request in then they are always there to follow up and ask about it.

From the first Sunday we went it felt like home to me. The songs are a mix of contemporary and traditional the minister speaks from his heart and with passion that keeps your attention and they have a great group that run the nursery.

As we were getting ready for church today both of the kids were cranky, Colin needed a nap and I'm sure Alyssa did too. She screamed the whole way to church but once we walked in her whole demeanor changed. She was happy and enjoyed saying "Good morning" to everyone and singing songs. She then did children's time and went to the nursery without a single thought. Colin was asleep by the second song and slept until the last song.

As I looked at both of them I realized they are just as comfortable at that church as I am. That makes my heart so happy to know that they will be introduced to God at a young age and will know that mom and dad believe.

I am so grateful that I have once again returned "home" to church.

My Grandpa

My grandpa will probably die today and I have such mixed emotions. From the time I was born until I was 16 my grandpa was wonderful to me. I looked forward to visiting him and my grandma. They would take us on amazing trips, and they had a very awesome gazebo that they would take us to and we would have picnic lunches.

When my parents divorced at 16 things took a turn for the worse and they cut me off. I stopped receiving birthday money and Christmas gifts. When I went to college it was better for a year or so but then I got married and they did not approve since I was young. When I moved to Missouri they refused to let me use their cabin at the Lake of the Ozarks. Also one time when we did go down to visit them at the lake a screaming match between my grandpa and I broke out and it ended with my dad in my grandpa's face and Chris and I leaving the lake before being there 4 hours.

I will go to the funeral because I feel like I need to say good-bye and also because I know my dad will need me.

I have cried a few times today knowing the end is near yet at the same time it is hard to be as sad as I know I should be.

We have known he was sick and has the end stages of Alzheimer's for the last year. Yesterday morning he had a sever stroke and now can't swallow or blink.

I am so glad that Alyssa got to meet him, and sad that Colin never got the chance. I am also glad that the last two visits I have had with my grandpa were on good terms and that I can go away with those memories instead of ending on a bad note.

June Challange

I am going to try to blog once a day for the next 30 days. I really enjoy reading other people's blog daily and I know I don't have a huge following but it is always nice to look back and see what was going on.

Today I have to take Colin back to the doctor. He has not stopped coughing from the RSV he got on April 19. We have tried liquid steroids, breathing treatments, time and everything else and it doesn't seem to help. He will calm his cough down for a few days but then he starts right back up. Hopefully the doctor will have some advice for us, I hate to pay $30 for him to say, "yep keep doing what you are doing".

So here is hoping we come home with a result today.

Day Care

It has now been a year since I have held a job outside the home. This time last year I had NO idea what was going to happen. I knew I didn't want to go back to teaching but wasn't sure if Headstart would hire me back. I knew that I was going to enjoy my summer with Alyssa and enjoy my second trimester of pregnancy.

Here I sit a year later with 15 kids on my daycare roster and some days during the week having 12 kids. I love it. I am so grateful to stay home with my kids all day and see their interactions with other kids. I love watching the other kids and though I'm putting in over 50 hours a week I do it in my own home. I'm home for dinner and I can be a wife as well.

So far I do not regret my decision at all to stay home and leave my teaching career on hold. Someone asked me the other day if I would go back to teaching after all my kids are in school. The honest answer is I don't know. While I do enjoy parts of teaching there were also a lot of parts I hated. So I don't know what the future holds.

Right now I know that I have had my best year in 5 years. I didn't not cry over a stupid boss or have to come home complaining about kids abusing or cussing at me. I have the best assistant that I could possibly imagine. She has become more than just an employee but a good friend.

I'm excited to see as I get ready to start my second year of my business to see where it goes.

6 Months

Dear Colin,

You are now six months. You weigh 20 lbs 11 ounces and are 27 inches long. You are a big boy wearing 12 month clothes but you are happy and adorable and that is all that matters.

You can now sit up all on your own and will sit for a long time and play with toys that we put in front of you.

You are not a huge fan of baby food but will tolerate it. You eat peas, green beans, sweet potatos, carrots, and apples.(Though you would not eat anything but peas until the last week or so which is after your 6 month birthday).

You have gotten better with sleep and only get up about 2 times a night. You usually eat and go right back to sleep though at 5:30 you get up for about an hour to an hour and a half then go back to sleep for 2 hours.

You enjoy watching what is going on around you. You have stopped nursing because you can't see what is going on so you get mostly bottles now.

You love your sister to no end and will do anything to watch her. In the car you will strain your neck to turn so that you can see her and smile at her. I love sitting in the front seat and listening to you and her play.

It is now summer and really hot outside so we haven't spent much time outside but again you love to be out there.

You also still love water. If you are crying and put you in the bath you instantly stop until we get you out.

Baby Boy I love you more than words can say and I can't believe you are already a half year old. I can't wait to see what the next half year and more holds.

Love,

Mommy

Branson

This past weekend we took a trip to Branson to celebrate a wedding of one of Chris' cousins daughters. The wedding it self was just an excuse to get out of town for a few days. The wedding was a mid day one on Saturday. So Chris and I chose to leave Thursday night and return Saturday after the wedding giving us some family time while also making the most of the 4 hour drive each way.

We left about 8 pm on Thursday night. On the drive down I was nervous that the kids would get a good nap in and when we hit the hotel a little after midnight they would be wide awake in a new place. I had no need to be worried. We pulled into the parking lot of the hotel at 12:10 and by 12:40 we were laying in bed with the lights off going to sleep.

On Friday after both Chris and I checked in with our work (not planned they needed us). We headed out for the day.

We did the Butterfly Palace which was really cool but Alyssa hated. She doesn't like the butterflies to be anywhere near her. There was also a mirror maze in the dark which she hated as well. The only thing she did like was the reptile room

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After that we went to horse stables that I was told about. Alyssa loved looking at the horses and kept asking to ride one. I told her she was not old enough but that was not an acceptable answer for her. So we found a horse that she could ride and with her helmet in place (even though it was still too big for her head) she went on her first horse ride ever. While looking at pictures you would think she hated it, but after listening to her once we got back in the car she LOVED it.

We then went and rode the DUCK. Which is a big boat/car that drives on land and water. Once on the water she was allowed to drive the boat and she loved that as well.

We then grabbed a quick bite to eat and back to the hotel for naps for both kids.

After the nap we headed down to the pool. This was Colin's first time in the pool and he loved it. We got him to float on his back and go underwater. He was kicking and loved splashing around in the water.(I can't wait until swim lessons start for him).

We then got out to meet the rest of the family for dinner. After dinner Alyssa got to go swimming with all of her cousins.

On Saturday we got up and went to a fish hatchery where Alyssa got to feed trout. She liked that but really liked looking at all the reptiles before hand

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We then went to the wedding where she ohh and awwed over "the princess" and then tore it up on the dance floor for the reception.

At 5 on Saturday night we piled everyone back in the car and headed home. Both kids did great on the way home though Colin did get a little restless.

It was a nice vacation and really enjoyed my time with my family. It was nice to get away even if it was only for 2 days.