Yesterday I had to get my car worked on. I called my mother in law to watch Alyssa for me so that I did not have to take her to the car dealership. I dropped her off and I went to the dealership.
I was gone about two hours. As I pulled up back to my mother in laws house Alyssa and her were sitting outside. I could see Alyssa and I thought "ohh she looks so tired" as I got out of the car and closer to her I realized that she might be tired but the eyes I was looking at were eyes that had been crying. She had cried for almost 2 hours. And not just cried, SCREAMED. My heart broke. I picked up my little girl and almost started crying myself. I sat in the chair and just kissed her and held her tight.
It makes me not want to go back to work. I am already getting sad about the thought of returning to work, and when I see that it makes it even worse. Alyssa is over at the babysitters today so that I could pack and clean the house before our trip tomorrow and I called to check on her about an hour ago. The babysitter said that she was asleep and had been fine all morning.
I'm glad that she is happy, and I will know if she has been crying when I go to pick her up in a half hour.
As I have sat here for the last half hour, catching up on blogs and e-mails I ran across one about a man who lost his daughter. I sat here in tears thinking I want to go pick up my daughter right now!
Going back to work in August I think will be harder than when I went back to work in March. It will be harder because I have gotten to bond with her more, and because it isn't just 10 weeks, it is 10 months!
It will be a long ten months and I can tell you I will look forward to every weekend. Hopefully sometime in the near future I will not have to return to work and will be able to work with my daughter and future kids by my side!
I love that girl more than I ever thought I could!!!
Okay now that I have rambled and not really said anything I'm going to go call the airlines to make sure all is good for tomorrow and then count down the minutes until I can go pick Alyssa up.
California, yes?
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