Over whelmed

Just a little over whelmed. I have picked this semester to go back to school for my masters. When I was in college I worked full time and went to school full time. So I figured I can do my masters ( only 6 hours a semester) and teach.
I know I can do it but right now as I look at the first assignments due I'm over whelmed. I have 5 papers and two quizes all due by the 11th. Some of them are group assignments, some of them are just answering questions and some are true papers.
I know once I get into the swing of things I can do it, but I know that some nights are going to be long and some weekends are not going to be enjoyed because I'm sitting at my computer typing papers.
I have told myself I don't have to get A's no one cares what your GPA for your masters are but I do have to get at least a B.
I have to do that on top of making sure that I have enough stuff planned for school. I'm so lucky that I was able to stay in first grade because that will help a lot. I know what to do and how to do it so I don't have to do as much planing.
The thing that doesn't understand that I have work to do is Alyssa. Right now Alyssa went down for bed at 7, but then woke up at 7:40 and is still fussing. Chris is trying to calm her so that I can work on my classwork but it isn't working.
Hopefully all the stars will align for the next two years and I will come out a stronger person with a wonderful masters degree and a great daughter that sleeps through the night!

Bad Sleeper to Horrible sleeper

It has been a slow process but Alyssa has gone from just being a not so good sleeper to a horrible sleeper. For the last week she has taken at least 40 minutes to put to bed, sometimes an hour and a half. Then she is up 3-5 times a night. Last night she was up only once but that was from 12:40-2:20. That is as bad as 5 times.
I think part of it has to do with her sleeping in a swing at the babysitters. I'm going to talk to the babysitter today.
I worked so hard this summer to get it so we could just lay her down and she would go to sleep. She was doing wonderfully at it. I go back to work and within in less than a month of me being back at work she is back to were she was or not worse than were she was at the beginning of summer.
She is down for a nap right now but I have to wake her up in ten minutes to leave for work. I would love to take a nap because after she finally fell asleep last night all I could do is lay there and think about things. I was awake for another hour after she was.
I have read 5 sleep training books, I have talked to countless moms. Some things work for a few weeks, some things Chris and I aren't comfortable with doing.
I can't wait for Alyssa to sleep through the night! I read that 1 in 6 babies does not sleep through the night until age 1. I think that will be Alyssa.
So for now think good thoughts and hopefully I will make it through the day.

I'm better Chris is not

Today I woke up feeling totally fine. I got up at 8:30 and was wondering what I was going to do all day. Well at 10:30 I got a call from the babysitter that Alyssa was throwing up and having the runs so I went to pick her up. Of course after I picked her up she has not had one problem what so ever. But I called the doctor and they said that that is normal and it could last 7-10 days.
Chris called at 3:45 to tell me he was coming home. Now that is really early for him so I asked why. He said he was sick. He is now asleep on the couch in the front room, I tried to tell him to go up to bed, but I think that was too far of a walk for him right now.
Alyssa is up in her crib supposed to be taking a nap but I hear her playing. I will let her play for another few minutes and then get her up and take her to target with me to get some things.
I will be back to work tomorrow, Chris will be home sick. Tomorrow night will be a serious spray and clean down of things so that none of us get another round of this awful bug. I will also be doing a big clean of my classroom tomorrow, because I hear it is going around school as well.

The flu

I am at home sick with the flu. It is only August and I have the flu! Alyssa went to daycare this morning so I can sleep all day. It is weird to be at the house without her but I have NO energy to take care of her. Hopefully I feel better by 3 when I have to go pick her up!

First Time Parents

Well you can call Chris and I first time parents. I blogged on Friday night about taking Alyssa to the ER with what we thought was an ear infection. Well turns out she is just teething. Last night I was feeding her peas using my finger, well she bit my finger and I felt the two bottom teeth poking through.
I still think she had a little virus as I have not felt good all weekend and she still is still a little off, but I think more than anything it was the teeth causing her pain and making her not feel good.
I'm sure there will be many more moments in her life that we over react but at least as she grows up she will know we love her more than anything and want the best for her.

ER Visit

Alyssa started not feeling well Wednesday. We thought it might be teeth. She got worse Thursday, still wondered if it could be teeth. Today she refused to eat and threw up twice at day-care. I picked her up, tried to take her to two urgent cares both wouldn't see her because she was too young.
So after a phone call to an after hour nurse off to the ER we went. We signed in at 7pm. By 7:30 we had seen the doctor and were just waiting for the discharge papers. We walked out of the hospital at 8:10. Not too bad I have waited at the doctors office longer.
The doctor said it was just a virus and that she would get over it. I'm sure he went back to the nurses station and told them about the crazy new parents who brought their daughter to the hospital for crying and throwing up once.
I don't regret going because I know if we didn't go I would have worried all weekend. Now I know that the only thing we can do is give her love and I don't have to worry that she might be suffering unnecessarily.
She is asleep right now so I'm now off to bed myself so that I can get up with her all the times she gets up tonight.

Thursday

( The picture is what I want her to do all night, but know she won't)
I'm so glad it is Thursday night! This week has not been as long as last week, but Alyssa has decided that sleep is over rated and woke up every hour last night. That makes for one tired momma in the morning. She would not calm down for Chris no matter what he tired. I think she might be getting teeth, that is the only thing I can figure because she isn't running a fever, her nose isn't stuffy and she doesn't seem sick. But if she is teething it is going to be a LONG week because you can't even feel the teeth in her mouth and her gums aren't swollen.
Tonight she was asleep I put her down, she woke up 5 minutes later and SCREAMED for 40 minutes, nothing worked, not holding her, not leaving her alone, not trying to feed her, not giving her the pacifier, finally I told Chris to get the Tylenol. He put it in her mouth and she was asleep within 2 minutes. I don't believe that Tylenol can work that fast, so what fixed her crying spell? Will she sleep tonight? How can I make her feel better? So many questions and not one answer.
The only good thing is I have an extra half hour of plan time tomorrow and an assembly tomorrow morning. I might be asleep for both! On a side note I am becoming addicted to soda in the morning to get me through the day. Alyssa needs to sleep through the night before I start gaining weight from all the soda I drink to stay awake.

Off to a good start

We have been back to school with students for almost a week now. I think we are still in the honeymoon period but so far I can't say anything to bad about my class. I don't see the issues I saw last year, though I do have one or two that will keep me on my toes.
Alyssa has also been at a new daycare for the last two weeks. Alyssa is loving it. She likes watching the older kids, they play with her give her toys and just love her up. Yesterday the babysitter sent home pictures of Alyssa with a note thanking us for picking her to watch Alyssa for us. That was really comforting since all of you know I have such a hard time leaving her every morning.
Now I do have my one complaint. Alyssa is STILL not sleeping through the night. For about 5 nights we got away without feeding her, we would just put the pacifier back in her mouth and she would go back to sleep, now for the last 4 we are back to eating at least once and sometimes twice a night. I don't know what to do, if we don't feed her she just cries and cries. I know it can't last forever she won't wake up at 18 to eat in the middle of the night will she?

First Day of School

Today was the first day of school. I have a list of 21 first graders. 16 showed up today. I have two that I'm going to have to keep my eye on. But I didn't have anyone cry, I didn't have to send any to the nurse and none that peed their pants. So I would say all in all it was a good day.
I forgot how tiny they are when they enter first grade. I was telling them how to sit in their chair and I had one raise her hand and say "But my feet don't touch the ground." now mind you these are not "normal" chairs these are little kid chairs. It is also amazing to see all my kids from last year, they all look so big.
It was nice to be in the same school for a second year and have a class from last year that comes by to see me.
I am tired tonight but not too bad. What is even better is that tomorrow is Friday and so that means that only one more day until the weekend.
Hopefully I have enough rules and games to last the day tomorrow, otherwise I will have to think on my feet! Okay off to see how many can write their numbers.

Dear Alyssa,

Dear Alyssa,
You are now six months old. I can't believe how fast you have grown. Just last night we put you in your bouncy seat and realized that you don't fit, your legs are to long and you can reach and pull off all the toys.
You have found that you don't like hats. At the begining of summer you would wear the hat and be happy. Now as soon as we put the hat on your head you pull it off. You can roll all over the floor and your crib and are up on all fours ready to crawl.
You are enjoying eating solids. You will eat oatmeal for the babysitter but not for me. You like peas, green beans, and squash. You LOVE peaches and pears.
Everyday when I go to pick you up from the babysitters you give me the biggest smile and it makes my heart melt. When I go to put you down you snuggle into my shoulder and make it so I don't want to put you down.
I love you baby girl and can't wait to see how you grow over the next six months.

Love,
Mommy

Working Mom

Being a working mom is hard. I read many women's blogs that seem to manage working and being a mom pretty easily. But everyone of those blogs also has one or two every so often that they question if working is really what they want to do.
Today as I dropped Alyssa off at her new daycare I barely made it through telling the lady all about Alyssa and out the door before I started to cry. I called Chris and told him I didn't think I was cut out to be a working mom.
I got to school and had meetings all day with my wonderful first grade team. During one of the meetings I was busy typing lesson plans and helping to organize things for the start of the school year. One of my teammates looked at me and said, "You can't tell me that you aren't meant to be a teacher, look at you".
I thought about that comment a lot today. I do enjoy teaching when that is what I actually get to do ( not all the other political stuff). I also know if I stay home I would miss my adult interaction.
However I couldn't help but all day think about Alyssa too. I couldn't wait to call to check on her, think about all the smiles I was missing and in fact started to miss her so much pulled up pictures on my computer to stare at. Every day at work I think about how I'm going to miss her first steps and words.
I wish I could have my cake and eat it too. I would love to work with school aged children and stay home with Alyssa but I know that isn't possible.
What I want right now is to start my own daycare, because then I could see adults, teach children and still be at home with mine but I do know that with that comes downfalls, not much vacation, and lots of diapers.
What does the future hold? I have no idea, but I do know that right now I look forward to walking into daycare at the end of the day and see Alyssa give me a big smile and snuggle into my shoulder.

School

School starts tomorrow. I am so nervous. I haven't been this nervous in a long time. I don't know what grade I'm teaching, I have to met with the principal and an NEA rep tomorrow.
On top of all that we just changed daycare providers and Alyssa can't start her new one until next week so she is going to spend the week with my mother in law. This is great because she is close to my work however the last three times Alyssa has been over there she has cried pretty much the whole time. Now I'm going to leave her for 4 days nine hours a day. I hope she is happier.
I can not believe how fast the summer went by. It seems like just yesterday I was walking out of school to start summer. This summer Alyssa has learned to roll over, roll across the floor, sit up by herself, laugh and play peek a boo. She has traveled to Ohio, the lake, and California. She has seen both sets of great-grandparents, all of her grandparents, great aunt, great uncles and 2nd cousins.
It has been a busy and very fun summer. If the school year flies by half as fast as this summer it will be over before I know it.
Alyssa will be 6 months on Thursday. I will write more about that later. Now off to enjoy my last hour of summer before bed. :-(